Fandom: Gankutsuou
Title: Sweet Distractions 1/1
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: OT3!, Albert/Francine/Franz
Warnings: crossdressing Franz, 'evil' Eugenie and Albert, leery Lucien and even Chateau-Renaud ><;; and basically some added crack.
Summary: What happens when Albert is bored? The OT3 decide to cause a sensation the likes Paris has never seen before. Who knew Albert's fetish for men in women's clothes had begun way before Beppo ever showed up?

Enjoy! ^^




Sweet Distractions:

At the umpteenth sound of the small pebble hitting against floor, Franz d’Epinay had just about heard enough. He shuffled the papers on the desk into a neat pile, sparing a glance at the other boy who was sprawled on the floor with a look of absolute boredom on his handsome features. He smiled softly to himself and mentally prepared himself for the ‘argument’ that was about to take place.

“Why the long face, Albert?”

“ ‘Why’ he asks as if he doesn’t know,” came the mumbled reply as the brown-haired man eyed his smiling friend.

“Well unless you tell me, dear Albert, I shall sit here and take a million and one guesses as to why you have that long look on your face. Are you not pleased to be with me?”

“About as pleased as getting a root canal,” Albert de Morcerf replied with a heavy sigh. “There’s nothing happening lately and everything seems to have lost its...” He struggled for the right word and settled for waving his hand in the air. “I need some excitement!”

“I’ve got two tickets to go the Opera. I hear Moriati is going to…”

“Spare me with the opera, dear Franz, I’d rather die than subject myself to another hour of that man’s girlish voice.”

“Then why don’t we take a trip?”

That seemed to spark Albert’s interest. He sat up and grinned at his friend with pleasure. “A trip! It sounds wonderful, Franz! Where to? Rome? Naples? Russia?”

Franz rose to his feet and moved towards the antique globe made out of wood. He spun it around gently and then stopped it with a finger. “Ah, how about America?”

“America?” Albert made a face. “Why that would take us forever, dear Franz. We might as well take a trip around France on foot like mere foot clerks!”

The blond shook his head softly and resigned himself to listening to his friend’s possible wild ideas. “All right, since taking a trip is out of the question, what do you suggest we do then? I simply cannot say anything to make you happy, can I?”

“Oh don’t be so uptight, Franz. You have always had your eccentricities…”

“So, yes, I enjoy traveling to foreign places and…”

“…burying your nose in books and communiqués that don’t make sense…”

“…at least I do not have flights of fancy like you do…”

“Ah, flights of fancy! Why I do fancy that we might try something a little different this time around, dear Franz!”

The younger man noticed the dark gleam in his best friend’s eyes and felt something heavy fall in the pit of his stomach. He could recognize that look anywhere and it was going to take all of his debating skills to talk his way out of this one.

“Dare I ask what inane idea you have conjured in that mind of yours, Albert?”

“Hardly inane!” Albert cried out indignantly as he rose to his feet and stuck out his chest proudly. “I say we dress up like peasants and live like peasants for a day! It will be an adventure, Franz.”

“Indeed…” came the soft mumble. The idea of dressing up in the dirty rags he had seen on most of the beggars on the street wasn’t exactly appealing to the young sage.

“But on second thought,” Albert said with a purse of his lips. “It might not be such a good idea after all…”

“I’m glad you’re beginning to see reason…”

“But wait! I have an even better idea!” Albert trained a rather intense look on his friend, causing Franz’s cheeks to darken with color. He had never realized just how blue Albert’s eyes could be. “You would fit perfectly for the role!”

“The…role?”

“Why yes! I shall dress you up as the mysterious princess Francine of Russia and you shall be my escort to the ball tonight!”

A thunderous silence befell the room as the two stared at each other. Albert was the first to give in to his giggles and in mere seconds both boys were rolling in the aisles beside themselves with laughter at the utterly and completely ridiculous idea! To think that he, Franz d’ Epinay would be seen in a ball gown…

“My mother has several wigs and I can steal some of her makeup…”

“Are you serious?!” Franz all but squeaked in dismay. “Albert!”

“Don’t worry! I’ve watched my mother get dressed for events and I have learned a thing or two…”

“That’s not the issue! I can’t get dressed in a ball gown…!”

“But you have such a slender figure, dear Franz! It’s almost a wonder you haven’t been mistaken for a female several times already!”

If Franz was red-faced before, he was literally steaming with embarrassment at this point. He slapped a hand over his eyes and groaned in misery, barely listening to Albert’s excited words as he made his diabolical plans for the evening. Sadly enough, Franz could find nothing to say to stop his friend from carrying out such a ridiculous arrangement. In his unspoken promise to make Albert Morcerf as happy as he could ever be, Franz had vowed to do whatever it took just to achieve that. Unfortunately, if it meant having to get dressed in an evening gown and pretend to be a woman for at least one evening…then he knew that he would just have to sacrifice himself for that cause.


__


An hour later and Franz was beginning to wonder just how Eugenie Danglars had become involved with this. Apparently on his way home, Albert has spied his betrothed and both had come up with a way to alter Franz’s appearance. Of course staring at his features in the mirror before their arrival, to make sure that he didn’t really look that feminine, hadn’t helped to boost Franz’s ego at all.

“Oh, you have no idea how much I’ve longed to this since I did your hair in ponytails when we were children, Franz!” Eugenie squealed in delight as she held up the rather breathtaking silver lame gown to his gaze. “Well, what do you think?”

“I…”

“He will look fantastic in it, Eugenie,” Albert interrupted with a knowing nod. “I hereby leave my date for tonight in your hands and by the time I return, I fully expect to be escorting Princess Francine to the ball tonight.”

To Eugenie’s delight and Franz’s horror (although the slight flutter in his heart betrayed his shocked features), Albert lifted his hand to place a gentle kiss on the back of it.

“Al…Albert! Wait…don’t leave me here!” The blond cried out desperately as Eugenie’s face seemed to take the shape of the very devil itself. She held up a tube of lipstick and a curling iron in each hand as she grinned with wicked intent.

“Now, give yourself to me, Princess Francine! I shall make you the belle of the ball!”

Albert, who had already made his way out to the street, felt his blood curdle at the deathly scream from his dear childhood friend. He could also swear he had heard a devilish cackle….but then again, it could have only been his imagination.

__


“My, my you look exceptionally handsome tonight, Albert,” Mercedes crooned in delight as she eyed her son with pride. “Doesn’t he, Fernand?”

“Of course he does. He takes after his own father.”

Albert grinned with pleasure at their praises. He tucked the carnation into the pocket of his black tuxedo and smoothed his hair for the umpteenth time, not really sure why he was nervous all of a sudden. It was only Franz and he had initiated the dare, so this was going to be a fun and adventurous night, wasn’t it?

“And who’s your lucky date for tonight, Albert?” Mercedes asked as they stepped into the carriage. “Eugenie?”

“No, mother,” the young man replied with a knowing smile. “I have the pleasure of escorting the most mysterious princess Francine of Russia.”

“Oh my, royalty!” Mercedes and Fernand exchanged proud looks. Their son really was getting around. “How wonderful!”

All too soon they arrived at the great Hall and stepped out of the carriage to the flashes of a million and one light bulbs. Eugenie was to escort ‘Princess Francine’ to the ball and Albert was to wait at the topmost stair for ‘her’ arrival as planned.

“Viscount Morcerf! Viscount Morcerf! Who’s your date tonight?” several reporters cried out and as a black carriage pulled up to the front of the grand building, Albert’s grin widened in delight. He motioned towards it with a bow.

“My date has finally arrived gentlemen! May I present to you, Princess Francine of Russia!”

Everyone turned in unison to witness the arrival of the mysterious woman. First to step out of the carriage was the familiar face of Eugenie Danglars who was surprisingly dressed in a dapper black tuxedo and a top hat as if she were a male escort. The Press looked disappointed for a minute, but then gave a collective gasp as a crystal-like shoe slowly appeared. The folds of shimmering silver cloth covered it quickly as the long train from the flowing gown fell to the ground. A slender white-gloved hand reached for Eugenie’s and as she took a step forward, the woman behind the elegant and breathtaking gown finally showed her face to the world.

The Press promptly went insane.

Never had anyone seen a beauty like hers! Her skin looked flawless! Her eyes a deep set and beautiful shade of brown that seemed to bore right through their very souls. It was a shy glance that won their hearts, a small smile from pink-tinted lips that hid so many secrets. Her golden hair was coiffed in the latest style and as Eugenie draped the large white fur coat over ‘her’ shoulders, she shared a small smile with her best friend in victory as they began to walk up the stairs slowly.

Albert, for his part, seemed to be frozen to the ground in shock. He wasn’t sure of what he had been expecting, but it definitely wasn’t Franz looking this…this…

“You can close your mouth now,” Franz whispered harshly as they finally reached his side. “You don’t want a fly getting into it, do you?” But try as hard as he might to look upset about his predicament, his cheeks looked flushed and his eyes a bit too bright as he lifted a hand to wave at his adoring fans.

“Well?” Eugenie whispered impatiently. “What do you think, Albert?”

“I…I…” Words failed him as his own cheeks darkened with color at the sight of his extremely beautiful companion for the evening.

Eugenie laughed softly. “I’ll take that as a compliment. Oh, they’re calling us in now!”

Albert held out his arm, a shy smile coming to his visage as he suffered Franz’s indignant glare for a second before grinning as his felt the gloved hand upon it.

“This is exciting, isn’t it, Franz?” he asked as they made their way into the grand hall, quite aware of the many looks of admiration that came their way. “I shall introduce you to my parents and we shall have the time of our lives tonight, shall we not?”

“I’ll get you back for this, I swear,” Franz muttered through a smile as he leaned closer to his best friend. “My face is going to be splashed all over the news tomorrow as the mysterious princess Francine…eek!”

It was Lucien Debray, a self-proclaimed lover extraordinaire and a close friend of Albert’s, who had come waltzing up to the couple with a pleased grin on his visage. He had reached for Franz’s hand and had placed a light kiss on it eliciting the small shriek from the horrified blond.

“What a breathtaking sight Albert,” Lucien said with a look that made no secret of just what he really thought of the princess. “Perhaps you will allow me a dance with the lovely princess once the ball begins?”

“Well…I…” Albert stammered.

But Lucien wouldn’t take no for an answer as he leaned close to place a light kiss on Franz’s cheek. It was taking all of the blond’s strength not to lift a leg to kick the orange-haired man right where it would hurt.

“And pray do tell me…where might Franz be tonight, Albert?”

Forgetting for a brief moment that he was a woman for the night, Franz opened up his mouth at the sound of his name. “I’m he…mmmphfff!!”

Eugenie and Albert had both slapped their hands over his mouth, laughing sheepishly as Lucien stared at them in confusion.

“Hehe, Princess Francine has a…a…uh…” Albert stared at Eugenie frantically. Seeing the desperate look, the girl finished quickly.

“She can’t speak French very well. So she will remain silent all night, won’t you Princess Francine?”

Franz shook his head rapidly and then nodded at the twin glares he received from his friends. They released him and all three smiled as brightly as they could towards the bewildered private secretary.

“Let’s go,” Albert said quickly as he all but tugged Franz after him with Eugenie following close behind.

“Wow, it’s gorgeous,” Eugenie said in awe and her companions couldn’t agree more. The ball room had been transformed into a winter wonderland, complete with ice sculptures, freshly picked towers of white roses, orchids, lilies and baby breaths. Sparkling white wine and champagne flowed like water and as Franz reached for a passing flute, it was quickly snatched away.

“Princesses do not grab drinks like that, Franz,” Eugenie whispered fiercely as she happily downed the beverage. She gave an unladylike belch and pointed towards her mother and Lucien. “There they go again.”

The trio watched as the handsome Lucien dazzled his way into Madame Danglars heart. Franz couldn’t help shuddering as he unconsciously rubbed the area where he had felt the older man’s lips on his skin. But their moment of solitude was shattered as yet another good friend, Raoul Chateau-Renaud walked up to them with a grin of pleasure on his features.

“Well, well, Albert,” he began as he pushed his glasses a bit higher up the bridge of his nose and gave a polite bow towards the ‘princess’. “You have yet to introduce me to the lovely lady.”

He reached for Franz’s hand again and the blond gave an inward groan as he suffered yet another gentle kiss upon it. He barely listened to Albert and Eugenie’s introduction as he felt something hot and rather uncomfortable forming in his nether regions. It took him a second later to realize that he had to make a detour to the restrooms…and quickly.

He tugged Albert’s tuxedo gently, nearly growling behind his white fan as Albert continued to talk as loudly as he could to Raoul.

“Albert,” he whispered harshly, leaning closer to the other boy. “Albert! I’ve got to go.”

“No, you can’t go,” came the quick reply from the corner of the older boy’s lips. “We just got here.”

“You don’t understand. I’ve.Got.To.Go!”

“Oh…oh!” Albert’s eyes widened as Franz’s words finally dawned on him. He eyed the princess who was trying desperately not to shift from one foot to the other while darting furtive glances around for Eugenie. He groaned inwardly as he noticed the girl already dancing with another woman in the middle of the dance floor. Now, he would have to be the one to negotiate Franz’s trip to the restroom.

“All right, follow me,” he said in resignation, reaching for the blond’s hand to lead him towards the, thankfully, much quieter sections of the grand hall. Only a few guests walked down the corridor and as the two golden doors loomed in the distance, Albert stopped and spun around to face his companion. “Wait here and I’ll try to see if the coast is clear, okay?”

“Su…sure,” Franz replied, slightly breathless.

“Are you all right?”

“No, I’m not all right,” came the irritated reply. “You try walking around in high heels with you dragging me along and being molested by just about every man in this place...are you even listening to me?!”

Apparently, the viscount wasn’t for he had disappeared into the Men’s room. Franz took a quick glance down the corridor and seeing that no one was around, grabbed the sensitive region between his legs and began to hop up and down impatiently. “Albert!”

“Clear! You can come in now!”

“Thank god!”

He fled into the room and then froze as he tried to think of a way to get this little task done. With a soft grunt, he began to fold up the heavy gown, cursing beneath his breath as the cloth got tangled with the diamond bracelet that graced his wrist.

“Need some help?” Albert finally asked with a soft laugh as he placed his hands behind Franz’s neck to pull down the zipper gently. “All you have to do is take it off from here…”

And just why was his breathing getting shallower? Damn it! This was Franz for crying out loud! He couldn’t possibly be having these funny sensations in his stomach at the thought of seeing him in a dress!

“Thanks…” Franz mumbled, deliberately lowering his head to hide the furious blush that had come to his cheeks. Both boys could barely look at each other now and the tension in the air was thick enough to be sliced with a knife.

“I’ll go guard the outside,” Albert said quickly and all but sped out of the restroom, cheeks flushed with heat and extremely grateful for the chance to be alone with his thoughts. He gasped as he noticed two men walking towards him. It was clear that they were making their way to the restrooms. Albert opened up the door a little and whispered harshly to his friend.

“Franz?! Aren’t you done yet?”

“Almost!”

“Hurry up…eh…you can’t go in, good sirs,” he said quickly as the men tried to make their way in. “There is a…a…a…”

“Oh, dear Viscount Albert, could you help me?” For a moment the three men outside the door couldn’t believe what they were hearing, none more so than Albert who was doing his best not to burst into giggles at how feminine Franz had sounded. He was glad to hear his friend speaking in Italian and with a light cough, he replied loudly.

“I am coming, princess! I told you that it was the wrong room. In France, the women go to the other room, not this one.” He darted into the restroom to bring out the flustered princess, who was now covering her face with her fan in shame.

“Oh, oh, did they see me, dear Albert?” she cried out as they walked briskly past the gaping men.

“No, dear princess, but we had better hurry if we hope to catch the next dance…”

“Ah, there you are!” Fernand de Morcerf bellowed with a warm smile as he approached the flushed couple. “I sincerely hope you do not mind me dancing with Princess Francine, do you, Albert? I would really like to get to know the woman who has stolen my son’s heart.”

“Uuum…father…I…that’s fine.” He gave a weak smile at Franz’s worried look but shrugged helplessly as he watched the older man lead the blond to the dance floor.

“Hmm, she really is a fine specimen, isn’t she?” A man stated quietly.
Albert didn’t need to turn around to know who was now standing beside him. It was Beauchamp, one of the leading journalists in Paris and also a good friend. “I wonder where you found her. So…how did you two meet?”

“On vacation,” Albert replied automatically, his gaze never leaving the swirling sea of white and gold that made his friend seem like a precious gem in the midst of every other person in the room. He could feel something tighten around his heart as Lucien walked up to the couple to ask for Franz’s hand next.

“On vacation? Hmmm…highly likely. Didn’t you tell her you were already engaged to Eugenie?”

“She doesn’t care,” came the soft reply as his hands clenched into tight fists, watching Lucien leaning closer to whisper something into Franz’s ear. From his position, Albert could have sworn that the perverted man was actually kissing the blond and if Franz’s blush was any indication, it was clear that the secretary was beginning to get a little too close for his liking.

“A mysterious beautiful princess who doesn’t seem to care that you are engaged and hmm…even Eugenie Danglar’s in the mix. Ah! Where is Franz by the way?”

“Out of the country.”

“Oh, where to?”

“Rome.”

“Interesting.”

And now it was Raoul’s turn! Even though the Princess was considerably taller than her new partner, it didn’t seem to deter Chateau-Renaud in the slightest. Albert could feel his temperature rising.

“Perhaps I should ask her for a dance next,” Beauchamp said with a small smirk forming as he noticed the barely concealed look of jealousy on his friend’s features.

“You wouldn’t dare,” Albert muttered, all but growling as he noticed Eugenie taking her place next. His eyes widened as the girl deliberately placed a hand upon Franz’s derriere, catching her teasing look as she blew a kiss towards him.

“Damn you, Eugenie!”

“And shame on you for allowing everyone else to have a piece of Fra…Princess Francine,” Beauchamp said with a soft laugh. “Oh, I see Lucien approaching again.”

That did it for Albert and without breaking a stride, he walked up to the dancing couple and cleared his throat before tapping Eugenie’s shoulder gently. “May I have this dance please?”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you,” came the taunting reply as Eugenie began to nuzzle Franz’s neck, causing the blond to dart a worried but embarrassed look at the seething Albert. “Mmm…you smell great, Francine…ouch! Learn how to share, Albert!” she added with a pout as she made way for him.

“Not when it comes to Franz I won’t,” he muttered beneath his breath as he placed a possessive hand on the blond, leading them out of the ball room and to the portico where the air was cool and sweet. The gardens lay spread out like a blanket of a million colors before them and for the first time all evening, Franz felt he could breathe again. He kicked off the crystal slippers and moaned softly in pleasure as his stocking-clad feet felt the coolness of the stone ground.

“Oh my,” Franz gasped, trying to catch his breath. “Well, that was definitely exciting and an adventure, wasn’t it, Albert?”

“Was it?”

“Oh yes. Your father is a fantastic dancer and besides Lucien trying to get me to sleep with him, I think I had a most enjoyable time... and you?”

He stopped long enough to notice the darkened look in his friend’s eyes. For reasons that would remain unknown to him, Franz felt his heartbeat quicken at a ridiculously rapid rate, now unable to move as Albert walked closer to him.

“You haven’t danced with me yet, my Princess,” he said softly as he held out his hand with a small bow. “I’m envious that everyone else has had a chance to hold you besides me. May I?”

“You…you…” He could only blush furiously, hardly protesting as Albert wrapped an arm around his waist while holding on tightly to his other hand. “You stupid fool,” he whispered into the older boy’s neck as he wrapped his arm around it, holding on tightly for fear that this precious moment was just another figment of his imagination.

“Your stupid fool?” Albert asked quietly with a soft chuckle as he closed his eyes, no longer trying to deny the pleasure of feeling Franz this close to him.

“Yes, my fool…but just try to get me in a dress again and I’ll kill you that is all.”

And as they moved gently to the faint music that drifted from the grand halls, the young aristocrats allowed themselves to dream of sweet things that could painfully never come to pass.


~The End~