Chapter 54:
Crimson Tide
Our Apartment
Sunday,
I wasn’t in the mood to hang
out with the others last night and excused myself early, no thanks to Duo’s
cryptic phone call. His goddamn impatience and irritability was evident and I
wondered if all the cheers and hero-worship had gone to his head. I’m sure the
meeting with the coach was an important one, but he could have at least invited
me. What’s so damn secretive about talking to a basketball coach? Hitching a
ride from Relena – Howard had left sometime before the game was over – I came
back to an empty apartment, all plans to celebrate his victory in our special
way no longer feasible. I was pissed and spent almost half an hour fuming in
front of the TV and watching highlights of the game on a local news channel.
Each time Duo’s face came on the screen, I cursed him silently. He effectively
cut me off just because of his precious basketball dreams.
I ended up falling asleep on
the floor, waking up with an aching neck and Duo’s light snore on the bed
behind me. My first instinct was to kick him off and lay into him, but watching
those peaceful features and realizing he was no doubt exhausted from all the
excitement from yesterday, I allowed him to get his rest. There will be plenty
of time to ask him about his attitude last night. My early morning jog took me
several blocks further than I usually go. I needed to clear my head, to think
through what I would say to Duo when he did wake up. If I had heard correctly,
he said it was a famous coach for Woodruff. Woodruff!
That’s Zechs’s school and I could have sworn we had already agreed we wouldn’t
apply to that place as our first choice. The knowledge that Duo might end up
going there makes me feel queasy.
Once I get to
Or maybe you’re just being selfish, a part of me screams.
Am I? Is it so wrong for me
to want him to go to the best college – Kensington in my opinion. Am I so wrong
in wanting him to be with me at all times? Does that make me too jealous,
possessive or needy?
“At least we still have a
whole year together,” I whisper to myself. “It’s a whole year to convince him
otherwise.”
Feeling much better about
facing him, my jog back to the apartment is less stressful and bothersome. I
even manage to smile at our landlady who is, as usual, perched by the gate with
a pipe stuck in her mouth and a broom between her trembling old hands. I wonder
if she ever sweeps or just stands there content to stare at those who pass her
by.
Once I get into the
apartment, I can hear water running in the bathroom. Duo’s awake and for some
reason, my heartbeat quickens – but not in a good way. I seem almost…afraid to see him, and stifle my usual
‘Duo! I’m home!’ as I kick off my sneakers and lean against the wall, holding
my breath and waiting for him to come out.
Confrontations are never fun.
After what seems like an
eternity, the door creaks open slowly and he steps out, dressed in only his
plain blue boxers. His hair is tousled, braid now undone, making him look so
much younger than his seventeen years. He seems to stiffen as he notices me,
those dark violet eyes narrowing for a moment before filling with…what?
Sadness? Warmth? Pity?
He scratches his upper arm
lightly and shifts from one foot to another. “Hey,” he finally mutters in a
barely audible voice.
“Hey yourself.” I nod towards
the bathroom. “I’ve gotta pee. Out of my way.”
He does as he’s told, not
really moving all the way out as I walk into the muggy and damp room to relieve
myself. I watch him through the mirror, seeing his indecisiveness as he looks
up and down….scratches the tip of his nose…and then takes a deep breath.
“About last night…”
I flush the toilet and move
to wash my hands, trying not to give away my curiosity and yet concern. Let him
talk until he runs out of words and then I’ll let him have it.
“About last night,” he
continues, coughing slightly. “I told you about the dinner with the coach
right?”
“Hn.” I nod in a noncommittal
way, dry my hands on the towel and step out. Breakfast. I’m starving. As
expected, he follows me to the kitchen, now talking a bit faster.
“Well, he seems to think I’ll
be a great player for his team. He says he’s spoken to Coach Septum and I’m all
but a shoo-in for Woo…the college team.”
“That’s great, Duo.” And as I
bang a cabinet shut to get out the cereal and sugar, while yanking open the
fridge to bring out the milk and eggs, I really am pleased that others think
he’s that great of a basketball player. But I’m not an idiot. He would have said
‘Woodruff’.
However…
“So…when did you get back
last night?” I ask nonchalantly, spooning the granulated sugar into my bowl.
He turns a bright crimson and
lowers his lashes…then mumbles something.
“What did you say?”
“I said I must have come home
pretty late.”
“With Wufei.” It’s not a
question. Another spoonful of sugar goes into the bowl. How many have I shoved
in now? Five? Six?
“He dropped me off at school
to pick up my bike. We didn’t spend most of the night together, Heero.”
I shrug and add another
spoonful. Will I be able to eat this stuff once I’m done?
“For fuck’s sake!” he suddenly
growls and pulls away the sugar bowl from me. Our eyes meet in a clash of
stubborn wills. “I drove around ALONE with my bike. I had to think!”
“Think of what? How you
couldn’t invite me to your precious meeting?”
“Oh please. I told you that
he said he didn’t want anyone else coming in! Wufei had to wait outside! It was
a fucking private meeting.”
I take a deep breath and turn
away, trying hard not to explode. “No, you didn’t actually. You got pissed that
I didn’t know who Coach Whathisface was and all but hung up on me and turned
off your goddamn cell phone!”
“Heero…” he begins in a low
voice that I know it’s a prelude to a shouting match and that’s something we
don’t need to have right about now. Time to shift the discussion to something
else.
“So. You went around
thinking. Great. What’s there to think about?”
He blinks as if slapped in
the face and then nods slowly. “Right. What was I thinking about.”
“I just asked you that.” Food
forgotten, I lean against the counter, arms folded across my chest,
waiting….breathing slowly…hoping the news isn’t going to be as disastrous as I
assume it might be.
“Now…” He walks to the other
side of the room and rocks on his heels for a moment, eyes darting to the
ceiling and then to the floor, before settling on me again. “Now, don’t get
upset or go into your moody silences. This is something that kept me up for
most of the night and…and…”
“Just spill it, Duo.”
He nods and then blurts out
so fast it takes me about a minute to understand what he says. “I think we
should cancel the trip…at least for a while.”
The silence that descends in
the room is only broken by the ticking of the fridge’s cooling system and the
sound of a neighbor’s dog barking outside our window. The kitchen suddenly
feels too hot and I long to thrust out my head out the window to get some air.
Cancel the trip? Cancel the trip?!
What the fuck is he talking about?!
Apparently, Duo’s not done
torturing me yet. “You always spoke about college being the most important
thing, right? So…I think it’s best we just…you know, start off with our various
schools, see what it’s like and then plan the trip during the summer break or
something. That way we’re not far behind from Trowa and the others. I mean
think about it, Heero. We’ve got our whole lives ahead of us and we can travel
whenever and wherever we want.”
He trails off and looks at me
with doe-like eyes, perhaps hoping he can appease me with his logic.
“You’re canceling the trip,”
I say quietly. I’m really not sure of how I feel at the moment. My head is
pounding and a fine red mist is slowly blocking my vision. To think of all the
bullshit I had to go through with my parents just for them to understand my
decision not to go to college immediately after I graduate – just to appease
Duo’s whim to travel and take a break…only for him to change his tune so…so…
“You thoughtless bastard,” I
growl, my hands clenching into tight fists which I proceed to bang on the
counter. I ignore the carton of milk that jumps and falls to the floor,
spilling its contents between us. “What the fuck are you talking about?!”
“You think I want to do
this?” he bellows back, eyes flashing with defiance. “How the hell do you think
I feel?!”
“YOU are the one with the
ability to say yes or no, Duo! No one’s holding a fucking gun to your forehead!
Since when did playing basketball become your goddamn dream?! Is that all there
is out there?! You’re going to be in charge of your fucking Dad’s company in a
few years! You want to throw that all away just to go to a school
like…like…Woodruff?!”
“And what’s wrong with
Woodruff?” He sneers. I don’t believe it! “I’ve always liked the school -”
“They are only known for
their parties and…and sports! They don’t hold a candle to Kensington!”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah!”
“Just admit it, Heero. You
don’t want me there because Zechs is there and you’re afraid you just might end
up liking the school a bit too much. Or maybe you think Zechs and I will hook
up while your tight ass is stuck in that prissy school…urgh!”
I didn’t mean to hit him.
Honest. But before I can get my bearings, he all but throws himself at me,
sending us stumbling to the floor as his hands wrap around my neck to choke the
life out of me. I wrap a leg around his and throw him off balance, but not
before he manages to give me a good jab in my jaw. Fuck! That hurt! I roar and try to straddle him, but he’s quick and
dodges, wrapping his strong arms around my waist and slamming us against the
wall. The pain is nearly blinding, but I’m not about to give him the
satisfaction. Hooking my arms beneath his, I almost lift him off the ground and
slam him against the other side of the wall, both of us ignoring the rattle of
things falling to the floor as we do a great job of destroying our small living
space. I can taste blood in my mouth and if the pain on my arms and side of my
neck are any indication, I’m bleeding there as well. I can’t remember the last
time we fought this hard, but I’m guessing all our frustration and the stresses
of finals are finally catching up to us.
It’s our way of letting it
all out – and in some perverse way,….it actually feels good.
“Fuck…you…!” he pants
breathlessly as I pin him against the wall, an elbow beneath his jaw and
against his neck to stifle his movements. His left cheek is swollen and there’s
a cut above his right eye, the blood flowing freely (but not much) as we glare
at each other.
“Right back at you, you
fucking hothead.” Not much of an insult, but I didn’t plan on waking up this
morning to start a fight. “Why…don’t….you…ever…listen?!” Each word is
punctuated by me thrusting hard against him, relishing in the helpless moan he
gives each time our erections (because boy are we aroused by now!) pound against
each other.
He sinks his hand into my
hair and tugs…hard, almost snapping
my neck back as he gives me a feral grin. With a low grunt, I release him
quickly, only to spin him around so his back is turned to me.
“Don’t you dare!” he says,
his voice sounding muffled as I press him tightly against the wall. With one
tug, I pull down his boxers to knead his ass cheeks as hard as I can, smacking
the taut flesh once…twice…three times…each time harder than the last.
“Don’t…Heero!” Pain and pleasure is mingled in those two words as I thrust a
finger hard and fast through the tight hole and into his anus. He hisses and
clenches his muscles tightly, trying to trap me deep within him, but I’m not to
be stopped. My lips hover around his ear, licking, nipping gently as he curses
me in weakening whispers. I withdraw my now wet finger and then slip two in,
listening to his hoarse cry of defeat as I stretch him as wide as I can go.
When my cock finally buries
itself within him, we cry out as one, hips thrusting and moving in a rhythm we
are all too familiar with. Pound pound pound
into him, wanting him to feel my fury at his decision, that even though we are
having sex, it’s not over – not by a long shot. I notice him trying to stroke
himself to completion, but I thrust even harder, trapping his cock against the
wall, watching his cum leave wet streaks on the cream-colored wallpaper. There
are tears in his eyes as he pleads for me to let him come, but I refuse,
whispering that it’s his punishment for being such a goddamn asshole.
“Oh god…god…Jesus fucking
Christ!” he yells just as I realize how deep I have gone and how sensitive that
part of him has become. Mercilessly, I continue to bury myself within him,
stroking him with my hard cock that now seems to swell with its impending
orgasm. I can vaguely hear him calling out my name, my vision almost becoming
non-existent as I finally explode with a breathless grunt. I pump my seed
through that narrow channel, the warmth caressing our flesh for blissful
seconds before pulling out slowly to back away from him. I watch his hole
twitch with the aftereffects of our lovemaking, my thick cum escaping to trail
between his thighs and to the floor. He sinks slowly to his knees, and then
turns around to stare at me with eyes still glazed with lust and anger. Some of
his hair hangs between his parted lips, a slight trail of saliva and his tears
mingling to give him a decidedly wanton look. God, I want him again, but this
is not the time!
“What…the hell…was that for?”
he asks in a breathless whisper.
“Like you didn’t ask for it,”
I reply and dart into the bathroom to get wet towels to wipe up the mess we’ve
made.
An hour later, and after
chaos has been restored to the place a bit (we ended up breaking a few plates),
we sit facing each other in the living room, looking like war-torn warriors.
After a quick check in the mirror, I have only a few scratches on my jaw and
chin – although it’s a bit swollen and tender.
“Fucking me doesn’t change my
decision,” he says after tapping his fingers on the desk for a long minute.
“You can throw me on the bed, tie me up and…”
“Don’t tempt me, Duo.”
“The point is!” he cuts in
loudly, although his flushed face tells me he would really like me to do
something like that to him. “I am going to Woodruff, Heero. And even if it
wasn’t for the basketball thing…I’d still go.”
My heart is breaking, but I
don’t realize it at this time. “You said you’d come to Kensington.”
“To make you happy,” he
finally admits – and oh, that stings. It really does. He sighs and runs a hand
through his bangs restlessly. “Look, Heero…”
“So you only did it because I
was going?”
“You all but bullied me into
it,” he mutters.
That’s not fair. “How? How the hell did I bully you into anything?! You sat here and
said yes, you’d go to.”
“But only because you were
going and you looked so happy to go…I didn’t have the heart to say no.”
“But now you do?” There’s a
stubborn lump in my throat.
He looks away. “I love you,
Heero. I really do and you know I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you…”
“You’re hurting me now, Duo.”
It comes out quietly, barely audible, my misery complete as I realize that our
dreams to be together might be dashed in a few seconds. “And the trip. Oh god,
the trip, Duo. It’s supposed to be our time together!”
“We’ll travel, Heero…many
times in the future!” He leans over the table and tries to reach for my hands.
“See? When you get to college, you know what you’re going to do. I mean…you
have it all mapped out already, Heero. Me? Besides running Dad’s company….which
I might not even want to do…”
“What?!”
He takes a deep breath and
gives me a weak smile. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and maybe I’m not
really cut out for that kind of business.”
“Harold…” I shake my head.
All of this…it’s too much. “I thought Harold and Archibald were going to teach
you everything?”
“Harold can take over if he
wants,” Duo replies with a shrug. “Honestly, Heero, can you really see me in
power suits sitting behind some desk crunching out numbers and all that
bullshit? That’s your world. It’s your thing. Not mine.”
“My thing.”
He nods enthusiastically and
I withdraw my hands from his slowly. I feel cold and even though the heater is
on, I still feel like chunks of ice are making a home within my chest and
stomach. He looks pained, but masks it quickly with another tremulous smile.
“I love basketball, Heero,
maybe more than you’d ever know. If I had remembered that scouts would want me
into colleges so quickly, I would have canceled the trip months ago. It just
didn’t occur to me until Coach Septum brought it up at the last meeting. And to
think…to think that Coach Rooney would want me…this is huge, Heero. If I miss this opportunity, I’m going to regret it the
rest of my life. I know I will!”
I say nothing. I mean, what
the hell can I say anyway? The more Duo talks, the more he seems to make sense
to me and I don’t want him to make
any sense. I want him to have a stupid argument or reason, something that I can
pounce on and remind him that it’s all a big mistake.
“…not too far from
Kensington. We can see each other during…”
“You’re not going to
Kensington,” I state flatly.
He bites his lower lip, sighs
and then nods firmly. His gaze is determined. “No, Heero. No, I’m not.
I’m…sorry.”
“I see.”
I rise to my feet and reach for
my jacket, shrugging into it as I feel his eyes drilling holes behind my back.
He follows me to the door, eager to know where I’m going, even though he
doesn’t ask. Hell, even I don’t know where I’m going, but I need to get out of
here. To think of just what kind of a future I’m going to have without Duo by
my side for several months at a time.
As I make my way out the
door, I stop and turn around (not looking at him directly) and ask in a voice
that hardly sounds like mine. “So you’re choosing basketball over me?”
His gasp of pain should have
given me some satisfaction, but it doesn’t. I want to scream, to bang on
something, to punch something or someone.
“That’s not fair, Heero,” he
whispers in a thick voice. “You know I wouldn’t…”
I suddenly give a bitter
laugh. “But you have made your choice, Duo. What more do you want me to do?”
“Heero!”
“See you later.”
I slam the door shut behind
me, wincing inwardly at the fist pounding on it in frustration. Blindly, I walk
away, not knowing where I’m going, not really caring. By the time I’m finally
aware of my surroundings, darkness has fallen and I find myself standing before
a giant mascot of the bane of my existence. It’s a big crimson and gold lion –
the letter W – big and bold on its vest. It’s a big balloon actually and it
hangs outside an austere white building along a busy strip of the North End.
With a heavy sigh - feeling my mouth fill with something bitter - I turn away,
only to stiffen at the sound of my name.
“Heero Yuy? It is you, Heero,
isn’t it?”
I turn to see that it’s…damn,
who is she again? Her boyish look reminds me of Hilde, and seeing the familiar
W pin on the lapel of her jacket makes me think that she just might be…
“Noin Lucrezia? I’m Zechs’s
girlfriend from Woodruff?”
“Oh.” Fan-fucking-tastic.
Just what I need. “Hi.”
“Oh my goodness!” She laughs
and claps her gloved hands together, before wrapping her arms around me in a
hug. Pulling back, she grins and waves toward the building. “It seems like it’s
been…forever! Oh dear.” She touches my cheek gently. “What happened to you?”
“I fell.”
She blinks at my curt
response but decides not to pursue the topic any further. “Oh…well, won’t you
come in? I’m here for the job fair and Zechs…”
“He’s not here, is he?” I try
to keep the panic out of my voice.
She shakes her head and I
give a small sigh of relief. “No, he’s not. I’m a part of the school council
and we make these trips to local branches find new students and introduce them
to our programs and what not. But wow…look at you! You must have grown like…a
couple of inches since we last met!”
“Hm…well…”
“So, will you be joining us
at Woodruff?” She smiles again. “I remember you and that friend of yours…what’s
his name again…Duo! Yes, Duo! He says he might be applying?”
Yeah, he is. It’s pretty much
a done deal. Hurrah.
“It’s going to be so great to
have you boys join us. Just think! More Fujisaki students at…”
“I’m going to Kensington,” I
reply tightly, wanting to end this conversation as quickly as I can. “Not…here.
Sorry.”
Her face fell. “Oh.
That’s…I’m sorry to hear that.”
We stand in silence for an
awkward minute, but luckily one of her friends calls her back in.
“But Duo will be going,” I
add quickly, not knowing why I said that. Maybe to make her a bit happy or
something. “He wants to attend Woodruff. I’m sure…he’ll have fun with you all
there.”
As predicted, the smile
returns. “That’s wonderful! I’ll be sure to let Zechs know! Well, see you
around, Heero. Pity we can’t talk a bit more.” She hugs me again and for some
reason, being buried against her warm jacket and inhaling that sweet scent of
her perfume brings tears to my eyes. “It was nice meeting you again,” she says
as she pulls away.
“Same here,” I manage, waving
weakly as she turns and makes her way into the building. I remain standing
there for a long time, watching the students of my boyfriend’s future school
walking in and out with a confidence that screams ‘I’m a Crimson Lion!’.
In about six months, he’d be
wearing those colors, hanging out with my former lecherous senpai, doing goodness knows what after classes are over, and
growing up…without me. Most importantly, we’d become rivals again.
All going back to fucking
square one.
~End Period Fifty-Four~